Cuyler Callahan's Official Home Page

Free Flow Writing 28 March 2010

Where is my purpose? The importance in what I do? There are things I want to do, but I feel no more drive to do them, because it doesn’t seem important. I want to write, I want to write amazing stories that make people think, but for some reason the importance of doing so seems to have escaped me.

Sure I could write a great story, with great characters. A story that people can’t put down, they see the world through their eyes, they feel what they feel, they see the importance of the characters goals, and cheer them on, all the while seeing what is changing the character. They will cry with the characters, laugh with them, and truly feel almost as if they are them. This is a great story, something I want to write, but feel no drive to write.

I’ve identified what makes writing important, the need to explore themes. Stories drive our world, inspire us to do better, make us think about who we are, and if we are living the best we can. This is all important to the world, but in the end I can’t seem to make stories seem important any more. I know I could write a good story. But I can’t bring myself to put myself into it, my soul.

Why is this? Why am I not seeing that the stories I could write will be important to the readers? It makes me sad that the motivation, the love of the word I used to have when I was younger has fallen away. My action when I do not write, the stuff I do to waste time is far less important then writing, but I find myself constantly doing them. Playing video games, sleeping, drinking, wasting time on movies.

Why do I do these things more, rather then write more and put good words on paper that others can enjoy. I have been slowly writing my Soldier Qualification Serial and I enjoy it when I do that, but that isn’t something I have to create. It is just my adventures during my course. No real theme or action, just some good times to share with others.

I need to find my motivation, and the importance again to write. I love reading and have been doing so more frequently, just having finished Holly Lisle’s Talyn. I’ m now reading General Rick Hillier’s “A Sodier First”. His Auto Biography. These books are both great. Talyn is a fantasy, and yet inspires great things from its readers. ” A Soldier First” is full of great wisdoms from a great man that changed the face of Canadian Military History and made our army better and more respected then it ever has been in a long time.

These books started off as an idea within the authors mind. They both realized the importance of the written word, and they found the motivation to write their books, and their books have both had a great importance on their readers.

I need to find my motivation, sit down, and write.

I want to be in the fantasy land again. Imagine myself walking through magical forests, or exploring dangerous caverns. Meet deceiving natural devices.

Why do I have such a hard time finding myself back in that world. I try to think of something to write about it. Sense when did I not have the mind to explore the fantasy world like I used to. I have a book with 60,000 words in it. It is only on the 3rd chapter. This world is deep and filled with culture.

This world has different cultures in it. Men of the mountain, men who rarely come down out of the mountains. They hate the lowlanders. The mountain men are not very smart in the ways of the lowlanders. They don’t have big cities, and tend to just farm, hunt, gather, reproduce, and follow very basic instincts.

The men of the low lands have grand armies, great cities, they are also in tune with nature, but they don’t just do the basics to survive, they have doctors, religion, artists, and other aspects of a more advanced society.

This world also has another race that is at war with the lowlanders. There is also a common enemy to all men of the land, which in the book, the people come together to destroy.

This book as some magic, but not much, I don’t like my characters relying on things that make it easy for them to accomplish their tasks. I have love, hate, and good times. I have bad times, and death. I have pain and suffering. I have tough choices.

My characters each have their own problems which advance the story forward. I don’t have any really special creatures. But the story is based in a world that is not ours, and the people of this world are different in ways from ours.

The people of the lowlands can communicate with the plants, and they can draw energy from the plants. Most buildings are built with what they call live wood. They plant trees which grow to form the shelter of the family. The owners of the house talk with the trees and ask them to do this for them.

So as you see, I have a thriving world. I have created a world where a story is possible. And I have 60,000 words and the time it took to write them invested into this book so far. Those words were some of the most enjoyable times I experienced. I lived in the world. I saw as my characters saw. When my characters cried, I shed a tear.

I learned that I as the author can’t have full control of my characters. If their personality and traits calls them to take certain paths when there is an action that needs to be decided, I need to go down the path that is correct for the characters personality.

This can lead to changes in the storyline, but not in the story. It just makes things run differently sometimes. It leads me to stray from the storyline. This isn’t bad as long as I get back on track.

Now what I’m trying to say here is that I had it in me at one time to write a great story. Now it has been almost two years since I have done any real writing. I need to find it in me to do it again. What story will I write.

Will I write a fantasy, a science fiction, or will my story be based in this world. I find that some great inspiration for writing fantasy comes from some fantasy metal music videos I’ve been watching an youtube. They get me motivated, they give me some ideas.

I see a band playing their instruments in a forest, and they show some dark scenes in the forest, then some nice beautiful scenes. The reason why this inspires me is because my most favorite thing to write about in a fantasy book is about the forests.

Anyways, I need to find my motivation to write some fantasy stories. I think these free flow writing sessions really are helping me out, and I’m feeling more and more like I’ll get to it and put the pen to paper so to speak.